2011 Moby Awards

I feel so literary today!

After my critique group's usual Thursday meeting last night, my kickass crit-partner-in-crime announced that she heard about this happenin' event, the 2011 Moby Awards,* hosted by Melville House Publishing. It's an award show for the best and worst book trailers of the year. Sounds SUPERCOOL, right?!

Also, she said there would be free wine.

So I was totally in.

We arrived at the chic warehouse-turned-bookstore in Dumbo,** secured our first glasses of free wine, and settled onto some concrete block stadium seating for the show.

Among the award winners:



Ghostgirl won most annoying soundtrack (I am sure you can hear why)

It's a Book! Won the "what are we doing to our kids?" award (teehee. THIS IS HELPING OUR KIDS!):



The Savages, by Don Winslow, won "worst big house trailer" (and also was totes my favorite of the night):



And Gary Shteyngart (who I had never heard of, but whose books I now MUST READ, even if just because he somehow convinced James Franco to be in his video?) won the Grand Jury award, aka the award they gave him because otherwise he'd win all of the things.***



For a full list of winners, check here. Personally, I wish they had showed all of the nominees as well as the winning trailers, because some of them sounded interesting. Also, I wish Jonathan Safran Foer had been there to accept the "best small house trailer" award. Because then I could stalk MEET him! Apparently he had something better to do with his night though. PFFT.

AND crit-partner and I think they should add a YA category. Just think of all the hilarious fodder to add to the pile! The only YA I noticed that made an appearance was the winner of the "most angelic angel falling to earth"**** award, which went to Lauren Kate's Torment:



(THOSE WINGS. did you buy them at Hot Topic? because I am totes sure I have that same pair in black...)

In case you aren't scared enough, check out the video that won for "most monkey sex"*****

After the awards and some mingling (wherein we seemed to meet at least half the staff of Electric Literature -- WAY TO REPRESENT, you guys! ... is your office like a block away or something?), crit-partner-in-crime and I stole one more glass of free wine headed for sustenance at a nearby Mexican place.



NOMNOM fajitas.

In other news. Total posterfail on the subway ride home:



LULZ it's funny cause it's June now.
In conclusion: Stay classy, my friends. Also, don't drink lots of free wine when you have work the next morning and your train plans to break down for 45 mins in the middle of Chinatown. wheeeee.

* Crit-partner knows about all the happenin' events because she lives in Brooklyn. In order to move to Brooklyn, you must first pass a 5-page exam testing your knowledge of artsy/hipster/underground events with not much publicity. You must also be skilled at locating new such events, and wear skinny jeans.
Truestory.

** Which apparently stands for "Down Under the Manhattan Bridge Overpass" for all of you non-hip non-Brooklynites (coughmecough). It is cool because large subway trains pass overhead every 10 minutes or so and make the windows rattle. I am sure the soundproofing companies score big bucks at the apartments down there.

*** Also, the "awards" themselves were tiny Beluga whales (apparently they couldn't find sperm whales, like good ol' Moby Dick, so they figured these were close enough) from a toy store, spray-painted gold.

**** According to Melville House Publisher Dennis Johnson (who looked rather haggard as he gave this introduction speech), "angels falling to earth and banging humans" was a theme of the year. From the hundreds of trailers he watched. Poor man.

***** But to be fair, it is called Bonobo Handshake, so really, WHAT WERE YOU EXPECTING?! ... do I hang out with Bio majors too much? is the whole Bonobos-love-to-bang-all-the-time thing not common knowledge?