International Sh*tty First Draft Week

This week, the lovely Intern is hosting a series on, you guessed it, sh*tty first drafts (you can read Day 1 here). For days 1-4, she interviewed published authors about their own sh*tty first drafts. Because isn't it inspiring to know that even professional writers have sh*tty days? It means you can too!

Today, day 5 of the week, is the International Sh*tty First Drafts Contest! All you have to do to enter is post your own sh*tty first draft, and you could win fabulous prizes. In honor of this, I decided to post a truly horrendous example from my current WIP. This was originally the opening scene of the memoir. Cringe in horror! (it is seriously bad. fair warning):

Our lives are made up of a million stories. The anecdotes we tell our friends to make them laugh. The bad days we share to vent stress. The daydreams that occupy our spare time.

If you're a writer like me, there are the fantasies too. Imagined worlds where we can make anything happen, craft any story we want: realistic fiction, romance, science fiction, anything. But some days, like this one, writers get stuck. No new ideas, no gripping plotlines, no characters screaming at me to tell their stories. Some might call it writer's block. I think it's more like life block.

So today, I'm going to try something different. I'm going to tell my Story.

Everyone has a Story. It doesn't detail every event in your life; doesn't include every detail or best friend or meaningful relationship you've experienced. It's simply the most interesting tale you have. The one that makes the whole room fall silent when you tell it. When you're telling your Story and you pause to take a breath, all anyone says is "then what?"

You know the Story I mean.

Some people's Stories are about self-discovery. Religious awakenings or survival in unbearable circumstances or triumph over oppression, addiction, trauma.

Mine doesn't involve those things. Mine is a love story.

YAWN. WHAT A SNOOZEFEST, right? Like, wow past Ellen, can you blather on about inanities some more, without any actual scene or setting or context? Thanks. Also, way to be meta. "Here is a memoir about writing?" Wat.

So after I bit the bullet and scrapped that entire "scene" (for lack of a better term), here's my new opening:

SNIP

How about you guys? Got any sh*tty first drafts of your own? Link me in the comments if you're doing the contest!

And speaking of contests -- you KNOW I couldn't end this post without a short plug: there's still a week left to enter the MG Fantasy giveaway, where you can win such treasures as a signed copy of Liesl and Po by Lauren Oliver (author of Before I Fall and Delirium) or an ARC of Wisdom's Kiss by Catherine Gilbert Murdock (author of Princess Ben and Dairy Queen).